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Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Foo Fighter On Evasive Maneuvers In Lunar Orbit Escapes Reptiloid Squadron

What you have here is a foo fighter at maximum speed shooting behind the Moon to evade attack by a Reptiloid vessel.

The Reptiloid ships are like black triangles, and they're even less visible than foo fighters at night in the visible light spectrum. You really need infra red viewing equipment to spot their vessels.

 This is an infrared sensor view of the same scene:

As you can see, there are two Reptiloid ships in hot pursuit of the foo fighter. Luckily the foo escaped. If they had been caught, the Reptiloids would have eaten them, starting with their kagooz. Breakfast, lunch, and dinner. They would've then fed their scraps to their pet lava snarks.

Lava snarks are bad news. They look a little like Earthly wolves, but they're all red, with bony spikes instead of fur. Their eyes glow red, because they project beams of red and infrared light in short pulses, and then look for the bounce back, kind of like your sonar and radar.They evolved in the deep caves of a volcanic planet, and their hides can take a tremendous amount of heat. If one is skinned, the hide can be used as a heat shield, it's an incredible insulator. The worst is lava snark breath, though. They can breathe a nasty-smelling mist onto you that ignites after a minute in open atmosphere with any oxygen content. Let's just say, they have no trouble cooking their dinner. We still don't know how the Reptiloids tame them.

If this had been just a single Reptiloid ship, the foo could've picked them off with a couple of well-placed acid missiles laced with green nanites, and a quick shot of the Green Beam. (The Green Beam hyper-activates the green nanites, and they eat the Reptiloids' ship in a matter of minutes.) But TWO Reptiloid ships can take a foo by using their heat ray to cook it like a squash, because the foo has to regenerate new probe missiles after firing its stock.

The foo fighters are fairly intelligent, and they know their squash is cooked against two Reptiloid triangles, so they boogie right on out of there at maximum speed, which is much faster than Reptiloid drive in local space. The only way the triangles are as fast as foos are in hyperdrive, because there is only one speed in hyperspace: instant.

If you see red eyes glowing in the dark, poor Earthlings, run, unless you have a cat with you. Cats are alien beings themselves. The Reptiloids and their snarks are so allergic to cats that they won't get within a mile of one. Why did you think cats have green eyes? They're guardians, and you'd best be nice to them if you don't want to meet up with snarks and Reptiloids  and get your kagooz cooked!

Zazzo out.


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